Moving Beyond My Bobby
Whitney Houston and her mentor, Clive Davis recently announced that she is dropping her comeback album on September 1st. Her highly anticipated CD (is it really highly anticipated or am I just prone to flowery words) has released the title cut I Look To You, and I must admit she sounds pretty good. I wasn’t sure if her beautifully smooth voice would hold up under years of alleged drug abuse and lifestyle stress.
I saw Whitney on some tribute show years ago and I thought her iconic voice had left… along with every ounce of healthy muscle she once had on her body. Remember the 2006 interview she had with Diane Sawyer in which she told Sawyer, “crack is whack?” She denied crack, but that statement alone admitted to a lot more than it denied. Most of us experienced a brief moment of shock and shame when we heard that statement; right before we laughed our heads off.
For a moment there, it seemed as if Whitney Houston would never return to the beauty and talent we fell in love with when she debuted in 1985. Hit after hit, song after song; I thought nothing could stop her. But something did stop her… or should I say someone stopped her.
Houston met Bobby Brown at a Soul Train awards show and they subsequently married in 1992, catching us all by complete surprise. Why would someone from such a well-respected background marry a self-proclaimed bad boy? (When you boast about being a bad boy, do you then have to do more and more extreme things to live up to your proclamation?) Well, shortly thereafter, it seemed as if Whitney Houston’s career and image took a nose drive and she kept ignoring the flashing red sign on the control panel that said: ‘Pull Up, Pull Up, Pull Up’. And soon, her space-bound life was plunging to the ground.
But now, it seems as if my girl is really back! Her voice doesn’t have the clarity of You Give Good Love, but it is undeniably Whitney Houston. I hope she goes the Clive Davis route and make songs reminiscent of the Saving All My Love and I Will Always Love You and not the post Bobby Brown route. Remember Heartbreak Hotel and It’s Not Right But Its OK? Not very becoming. Nevertheless, it looks like Whitney is finally getting past the Bobby Brown influence in her life.
Have you ever had a Bobby in your life? Someone or something that caught you completely off guard and took you for a ride you didn’t deserve or ask for? I think we all have. My Bobby didn’t derail my career or anything like that, but he certainly derailed my confidence and sense of self-worth. With him, I endured things I never thought I would or could.
I played a third (or maybe even a fourth) in a game that was already too full. That was such an uncomfortable time in my life because I knew I was settling for far less than my worth. To this day, I am extremely embarrassed and ashamed to even admit it.
What finally made me recognize the destruction I was allowing? I’d love to say I finally woke up, but honestly, he finally made the ultimate display of disrespect and contempt. It was so blatant that I couldn’t spend another single moment being less than the person I know the Lord intends for me to be. I could no longer be less than who I am in order to be with someone who is less than who he should be. (You may have to read this sentence a couple of times, but you will get it!)
And at that moment, the light bulb went off and That Teowonna was back! My mother and friends jumped for joy and celebrated my comeback with me!
What or who is your Bobby? What are you going to do to move beyond your Bobby? I’m sure there is someone waiting to celebrate your comeback with you!
Check back tomorrow as I wrap up this blog series with Waiting for My Sargent. Edit
I don’t have a “Bobby” of which to speak, but I do have some comments regarding Whitney. You know, there were rumors in the late 80's that Whitney had an “expensive” habit. Rumors also suggested that her snow white image was nothing more than well-executed record company PR work. Even more rumors suggested that Whitney was somewhat of a bad girl in private. ...And then came Mr. My Prerogative.
Now we all know that rumors aren't the most reliable sources; but I have to wonder if Bobby took Whitney to a place that she was longing to go anyway.
The Apostle Paul describes sin in this way…that an ungodly desire is already inside of us and that it waits for a given temptation which is outside of us. And when the two [one’s desire and one’s temptation] meet, sin is conceived. I think Whitney was already an addict just waiting for her fix. …And then came Mr. My Prerogative.
Unfortunately, we have a propensity to not analyze where those temptations lead us. But when we do come to our senses, most of the time we can correct our course and get back to business. I’m really glad to see Whitney shaking loose those demons in her life. It was sad that she chose the Mr. My Prerogative path. It seems that she had the world in her hands before the slide. T, I can see how leaving Mr. My Prerogative is more of metaphor for reclamation. Good topic. Delete Reply
the rumors that mark speak of do contain a lot of fact. the descriptive from the Bible also is fact. whitney had more issues than the general public had knowledge of long before Bobby, but Abba Yahweh allows those situations and circumstances to occur to saving of our relationship with Him. at this point, whitney (as do all of us) has to make a quality decision to come under His care and guidance. not for form and fashion of it, but in sincere submission to the Word. we all have a choice to make; heed good advice or walk out the path that the good advice is trying to help you avoid. and like the most of us, whitney chose to walk it out... Delete Reply
I thank you both for taking the time to share your thoughts and words of wisdom. Mark, Whitney, like all of us have ouror deep-rooted issues that we must deal with. Unfortunately, there are some people who use those issues to our detriment instead of helping us overcome them. And V, thanks for reminding us all of His saving grace. It is free for the asking and taking. Much love, my friends. Delete Reply
Great article and I do plan on posting your blog to my Awesome blogs. Yes girlfriend, we've all had our "Bobby's." I for one have never looked at celebrities as anymore than people. Whitney Houston, simply because she's achieved all that she has was never immune from falling from grace. I recall reading an Essence article back in the 80s and the writer commented on her "pack of Newports" on the table and I was kind of shocked. "Wow, Whitney smokes and she still sounds so great!" She's human just like you and I and sometimes love gets in the way. Her image was created by music execs. Of course it was! Her mother after all is famed gospel star Cissy Houston.
We unfortunately watched Whitney with Bobby on and off, and I for one thought, He must really be throwing it down in the bedroom because no one and I mean NO ONE could understand what she saw in him. The world rejoiced when she finally said enough is enough.
Whitney now has a testimony and we who worship the Father know, you can't have a testimony without a test! Amen Whitney! Just do you and let people hate! They're gonna do that nomatter what you do. Delete Reply