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Wives forgive Husbands, South Carolinians can Forgive Sanford

Last week, I sang the praises of Vickie Kennedy and how she saved Senator Ted Kennedy. It is true that Senator Kennedy was buried a flawed yet reformed man instead of a disgrace and an old fool. I gave much of that credit to his wife, Vickie. But I also recognize Father Time and God had a lot to do with Senator Kennedy’s transformation.

In my Kennedy blog, I outlined many of his flaws… from cheating on a test while at Harvard to cheating on his wife. These are the more mild offenses. But even after many of a transgression, Kennedy was forgiven time and time again. He went up on ethics charges twice; both times, the charges were dropped days later. Why were the American people (and the Senate Ethics Committee) so willing to forgive Senator Kennedy? Is it simply because he was a Kennedy and many revered the family even though oftentimes their actions were beyond reverence? Or are we really a forgiving people who look for the good in people? We love a comeback story, don’t we?

Remember Bill Clinton and the Monica Lewinsky scandal? I remember that situation very vividly because I was living in Dallas, TX and had just broken up with my boyfriend whom I suspected cheated on me. I didn’t have a very high regard for men at that time… so President’s Clinton’s poor discretion didn’t do very much to renew my confidence. But ultimately, like I did my ex-boyfriend, the American people seemingly forgave Bill Clinton and moved on. In spite of his transgression, President Clinton will still go down in history as one of America’s favorite and most effective presidents… especially among black people.

I know woman after woman who have forgiven men who have wronged them in the worst way. Myself included And men have been known to forgive women, depending on the nature of the crime, of course. Cheating, probably not. But lesser crimes that don’t shake their faith in the woman, the chances of forgiveness are higher.

So having said that, as a people, we have forgiven political leaders time and time again. As individuals, we have forgiven those we love even more often. So why, please explain, can’t or won’t we forgive Mark Sanford?

I agree that what Manford (my new abbreviation for Mark Sanford) did show a huge lack of judgment. It was inexcusable. So was leaving a drowning woman in a car for eight hours. So was performing any sexual act in the White House with any woman other than your wife. But we forgave.

Just yesterday, House Speaker Bobby Harrell joined other Republicans who said that Manford should resign because the state would get “bogged down” in the embattled governor’s distractions. He is right… the state will get bogged down, especially since people like him and other high-ranking republicans will not let it go!

Have you noticed how there seems to be more Republicans calling for Manford’s resignation than Democrats? Why is that? You would think Manford’s own party would be backing him… more willing to forgive him. Well, the reason is simple… the Republican party wants to cut ties with Manford as soon as possible so they can have as much of a fresh start as possible in the next election. They want to say, “Yes, we voted Manford in for two terms, but when he did wrong, we cut him loose with a quickness!” By denouncing Manford, they can continue to claim to be the ‘moral majority’ and send a message to any future governor who takes that notion to flee the country to get a little foreign nookie.

Now why aren’t Democrats making more noise to have Manford thrown out of the Governor’s Mansion carrying trash bags full of clothes? Because they know what (or should I say who), would be coming down the pike… Andre Bauer. Trust me when I say, the state is better off with Manford for the next fifteen months than Andre Bauer. I mean, do we really want the state to be run by the likes of Andre Bauer? At least with Manford, we know he will walk the straight and narrow with the spotlight on him. Who knows what Bauer will do? Who knows what might happen the moment he walks across the threshold of the Governor’s Mansion. I might wake up the next morning and not have running water… the whole state might just crack off from the rest of the nation and drift out into the Atlantic Ocean. And since most black people can’t swim… I think we need to let Manford spend the remaining few months in office.

Ultimately, this blog is about forgiveness. Why are some more deserving of forgiveness than others? Because of their family name? Because he has done a lot for a nation and a race of people? A sin is a sin. We all do it. Everyone deserves to be forgiven. When I have forgiven those who have wronged me, sometimes the relationship can be mended; others, we just have to move on. In my relationship with Manford, I am willing to not only forgive him but not support any efforts to impeach him. This is a relationship I am willing to mend.

I agree with Manford, this is pure ‘playing politics’ and he still has some work to do. Remember the last time your husband or wife slipped up and did something wrong? Sometimes the things they are willing to do and go through to make it up to you was worth the screw up. I think Mark Sanford has learned his lesson. History was been written and he will not be remembered politely. So I say let him do his best to rewrite it. Let him spend these last 15 months trying to make it up to us! South Carolina may be all the better for it. Edit

8 comments

How about men forgiven women... Men are not the only one during wrong in life. women are during there wrong as well. when a man is having an affair who is he having it with.. a WOMAN.... she knew what she was getting into.. let all do the right thing.. Men and Women.... because of all the wrong men have done in the past to women. Women now think it there time to get back at men. No keep that good in you for our children need it..the Women carry the life cycle. She is the first to have influence over that child as it grows inside here. if she give up here good about marriage and relationship what do we have left........... Delete Reply

I just went back to your Jackson, Fawcett, and Sanford blog and re-read an exchange I had with you regarding Manford's career. Continuing my point, I think the Republicans missed their window to take the high ground. They should have launched an ethics investigation right off the jump. But now whatever they decide to do won't save face with the SC voters. They blew it. Impeachment whether politically inclined or criminally deserved (which I doubt is warranted) would just add fuel to the fire.

I guess if Manford would have been more forgiving when it was Clinton & Lewinsky, it would be much easier for others to forgive him. By his own words 10 years ago, he should resign. But then again, double standards do run rampant throughout the Republican Party. Delete Reply

Thanks for your input... I think in my blog, i said men forgive women too... also every man who cheats doesnt always come out in the open about being married. You look at it like a woman is trying to get back... i say a man turned a good woman bad. But this is about forgiveness. Can you forgive Mark Sanford? I'm sure someone has forgiven you for something... just as you have forgiven someone. Delete Reply

as a wife scorned by an adulterous husband, i speak from some experience. because i love him, i forgave him. though sometimes still feel the pain of the betrayal, i have moved forward with him happily. Forgiveness is attainable.

As for Manford, i think the repub should just let it go. if they had called for his immediate dismissal at the beginning, it would prob have set better with folks. but now, it looks like they are just trying to save face and get at him. folks aint taking to that whole stance to much. i think like i have excepted and moved past my husbands sexual discretion, SC is ready to move past Manfords.....plus aint bauer a drunk? Delete Reply

Are people still talking about Manford? (Love that nickname) Must be only in SC. That's so yesterday's news. :) Delete Reply

lol about Bauer!

It seems Mark and anonymous share the same feeling about the Republican party on the Manford situation; they should have done something immediately (and I not saying 'they' as if I'm not one of them... 'they' is referring to the Republican powers that be). But I JUST got a text from WLTX (local news station) that the SC GOP is calling for Manford's resignation. So yes, Donna... we are still talking about Manford. Check out CNN tonight... I bet they will be talking about it too! Delete Reply

that clown needs to go...yesterday!!! Delete Reply

leroyda1st: I hear ya... but as stubborn as he is, I think he will hold on for dear life. Remember the stimulus money? He had to be taken to court to accept it! Delete Reply

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